ETFs Honey Boo Boo Might Buy

Reserving quips about the decline of American culture, which was probably marked by the debut of television show revolving around the Kardashians and puns about the Mayans being right, the reality is TLC's "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" has viewers.

In fact, the reality show about a young beauty pageant contestant in rural Georgia and her family has enough viewers that Discovery Communications (NASDAQ:DISCA), TLC's parent company, has signed on for more episodes. Alana Thompson, or Honey Boo Boo, may even be up for a raise, according to The Huffington Post.

Again, the comments about the decline of civilization will be left aside, but it is worth noting Honey Boo Boo averages better ratings than the Republican National Convention got, according to The Huffington Post reported. That is a feather in the cap of Thompson and if she gets a raise, she might want to consider the following ETFs.

iPath DJ-UBS Livestock TR Sub-Index ETN (NYSE:COW)

Thompson, seven-years-old, is like many kids her age in that she has a pet. Unlike many of those peers, Thompson has a pet pig. Due to that, perhaps she would want to establish a long position in the iPath DJ-UBS Livestock TR Sub-Index ETN, which allocates a portion of its weight to lean hog futures.

Then again, maybe she knows the fate of those lean hogs. That could be the impetus to short COW, which is not a bad idea, because this ETN has a history of faltering even when livestock prices rise.

Consumer Staples Select Sector SPDR (NYSE:XLP)

Honey Boo Boo's dad, Mike Thompson, has a habit that is nasty in the eyes of sum. He dips tobacco and has even been seen on camera doing so. We do not know what brand he prefers, but it is not unreasonable to assume it is either Copenhagen or Skoal, the two dominant brands of smokeless tobacco. Both are owned by Altria (NYSE:MO), which accounts for almost 4.5 percent of XLP and is a top-10 holding in the ETF.

PowerShares Dynamic Media Portfolio (NYSE:PBS)

This has been a great for the PowerShares Dynamic Media Portfolio. Spurred by the Summer Olympics and the thesis that advertising revenue increases during election years, the ETF has almost 25.4 percent.

It might be enough to make some folks cringe, but perhaps Honey Boo Boo has chipped in on the alpha delivered by PBS. Discovery Communications is the ETF's second-largest holding with an allocation of 5.1 percent. In what one can only hope is pure coincidence, PBS jumped 1.5 percent on volume that was more than double the daily average on Thursday, the same day TLC announced new episodes of Honey Boo Boo are in production.

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