Today we’re going to have a discussion about graciousness in defeat, using the story of one woman. We’re going to leave out partisanship and personal taste, and try to pull the lens out far enough to see the proverbial big picture, which contains a valuable nugget if we choose to really, truly focus.

The woman -- let’s call her Hillary -- wants the most coveted job in all the land. She wants to lead it. It’s a beautiful land and its citizens, more than any other country in the world, have opportunities to do and be anything they can imagine or even beyond. She wants to sit atop that lofty perch so badly she can taste it, especially after working almost her whole life to make it happen.

But soon she finds herself sharing the limelight with a brash, idealistic competitor. Let’s call him Barack. He, too, wants the most coveted job in all the land. He, too, can taste it. He has worked hard to bring himself into contention and he is putting up a heck of a fight. Soon, he edges her out in a close battle, and it brings him one step closer to the coveted job.

The citizens are divided on this, but most agree that it is important to be gracious in defeat. 

Meanwhile, in their own lives, many of the citizens do not come close to walking that talk. They cannot handle someone beating them out for a parking spot at the mall, or the guy in the next car trying to get ahead of them when two lanes merge. They make spectacles of themselves at their children’s Little League games because Joey got more playing time than Mikey or the umpire made a call they didn’t agree with.

In their professional lives, many of the citizens rail when their idea doesn’t get equal play in the meeting, then let it fester for weeks and months. They obsess about their book deal not being as lucrative as the other guy’s and wonder who the other guy “knew.” Instead of reaching down to help pull someone else up, they prefer to keep them underfoot.

As for their personal lives, the citizens watch television shows pitting people against each other for the attention of one available man or woman in the hopes they’ll see some backstabbing. They, in fact, revel in anything that perpetuates the idea of ungraciousness in defeat. High schools, and now even grade schools, have become breeding grounds for one-upping each other on purchases ranging from technology to Coach handbags.

To so many of the citizens of this privileged land, everything is a competition -- and they hate when they feel they are losing ground or aren't even in contention. So you’d think they would understand what it was like for the woman to stand before a packed house and an international television audience and endorse the man who emerged victorious with vigor and conviction. You would think that instead of finding things that might be missing from her speech, they could celebrate its nuance.

It was not a particularly courageous speech, or even a selfless one. How could it be? The most coveted job in the land was at stake and she lost her shot at it by a hair. The citizens kick themselves when they get in the slow line at the drugstore and see their neighbor check out two minutes before them. They can’t handle when the guy next door has a better-looking lawn than they do.

And yet they want the woman to effuse and gush when she talks about her competitor. She pointedly asked her supporters to get behind him. She went so far as to ask them to question their own motives as the final push for the coveted job draws near. She laid out a vision. She rallied a crowd on his behalf, said words that would have been difficult for any human being to say in the face of defeat, and said them like she meant them.

If the citizens are not impressed by that -- just that -- perhaps their lens could use a little Windex.

Nancy Colasurdo is a practicing life coach and freelance writer. Her Web site is www.nancola.com. Please direct all questions/comments to FOXGamePlan@gmail.com.